What makes us like this?

What kind of an effed up society are we where it is ok for a girl to marry a guy (who is upfront about not putting in a committment because he does not find her "attractive") because her mother is so unwell that her mother may not live for too long therefore she does not have the luxury of time.

But the same girl will not come and live with her mum for that one last year because she claims she "cant" - though am not clear whether the reason is money (the girl of course lives in the US ofA) or is it the fact that after many years she would have to live with her parents again.

Needless to say this is a what we would classify as a "well educated girl". She, of course, thinks by getting married before her mother may or may not die, she is appeasing her mother's sense of responsibility and thereby making her happier. Would this mother be happy to know her daughter's intention behind matrimony? "If it does not work out, I will walk out".

To my mind instead of entering a marriage where you enter thinking you will walk out one day, you would rather spend that one year with your mother, gather a treasure trove of memories one day you will glad to have instead of living unhappily without your mother and in what looks like will be an unhappy marriage...

Yes am aware that we, as a generation, do not think are much of our parents and think that more often than not they are just making comments and suggestions to rankle us. But these very parents are people you have traits and natures common to. So in all probability if you do last through your marriage to make a baby, you will repeat what your mum said to you, at the same time, in the same intonation, to your offspring.

At that time you will miss your mum and will definitely wish she were around so that you can tell her that though a tad late, you do understand where she was coming from. For those unfortunate people who would not have their mothers to tell, you will wish you spent more time in those last few years because now you will know what is would be like to ignore your parents.

I think it is a lesson learnt by me in time, to learn the value of my parents and my relationship with them. They may get a little slow, even forgetful and will constantly be judgemental and interfere with every aspect of my life but if it weren't for them I would not be here.

And I can say for certain that than entering a marriage which makes me unhappy, my mother would rather I did not get married at all because though I would be alone for the rest of my life, I would at least be content and if I am lucky, even happy, while living by myself.